Morgan's Sexual Orientation
by legaldramafan
Summary: Everyone always thought that Morgan was straight as an arrow and Reid was a poor homosexual in love with his heterosexual best friend. Until Emily drags Reid to a club and they see Morgan kissing a Spencer-look-alike. Why doesn't he want Reid? M/R SLASH!


**DISCLAIMER: I don't own Criminal Minds. I have no rights to it. I get no profits from it.**

Morgan's Sexual Orientation

"Not that I don't love spending Saturday night with you Emily, by why didn't you ask Morgan to go dancing with you? It's really more his scene."

"I know," she replied as they headed to the bar for a drink or two before dancing, "but . . . to be honest . . . I called Morgan first and he had a date." She looked up at him with a pouty face that said 'please forgive me.' "He uh, said it was the third date, actually."

"Wait. He's been on three dates now with the same woman?"

"Apparently."

"Do you think he knows that picking her up last night, buying her breakfast this morning and taking her out again tonight does not count as three dates?"

Emily laughed as she sipped her gin and tonic. "There are some cute guys in here tonight," she commented raising he eyebrows suggestively.

"You know I'm not interested."

"But you deserve to be loved. The whole unrequited love thing is _sooo_ overrated."

"Why don't you practice what you preach and then maybe I'll do the same."

"Point taken." She quickly finished her drink and grabbed Reid's hand. "Let's go boogey!"

Reid rolled his eyes and followed her, abruptly stopping when they were ¾ of the way to the dance floor.

"Reid?" she asked, turning around to join him where he had planted his feet, his mouth hanging open. He pointed and she finally understood why he was frozen in place. He was staring at a stylishly dressed Derek Morgan making out with a young man who looked to be about Reid's age. He was about Morgan's height, had a slender but muscular build, curly brown hair. They both watched in horror as their co-worker's hands cupped the unknown man's ass as they leaned their foreheads together, pausing to breathe, Morgan grinning like a fool.

"Emily, I'm sorry, but can we . . ." Reid couldn't even form a complete thought.

"Of course," she replied, gently wrapping an arm around Reid's waist and led him out of the bar. When they reached the sidewalk Reid leaned over with his hands on his knees and began to hyperventilate.

"Did you, did you . . ."

"No Spencer. I didn't know he was bringing his date here and I definitely didn't know that he was into guys. If I had known that, you would have been the first person I told."

He slowly stood, still having trouble breathing. "It was . . . it was one thing, when it was women . . . I mean . . . I mean I knew I couldn't have him because he was straight. But to . . . to see him with another guy . . . I mean he wasn't my long-lost twin, but there were definitely some similarities . . . so now I, I know . . . I know it's not that he doesn't want me because I'm a guy, he just plain old doesn't want me . . ." He futilely attempted to wipe away the tears that were now streaming down his face.

"C'mon, gimme your keys, I only had one, I can drive." Reid nodded, handing his keys to her and climbing into the passenger seat. They were driving to Emily's when her phone lit up. "What the fuck!" she exclaimed, pulling over to answer. "PG, we're supposed to be off this weekend! _Why_ are you calling me?"

Reid looked at Emily expectantly. "We have a case." He nodded as she pulled a u-turn and headed back toward Quantico. Despite the fact that they were supposed to have the weekend off, they both had go bags in the trunk of the car.

"Damn Prentiss! Is there a new dress code I don't know about?" She turned her head and glared as Morgan when he walked into the war room. She was wearing a banded cobalt blue dress with stilettos, her hair curled and she donned more make-up than she wore day-to-day.

"I happened to be out with Reid when Garcia called us. We came straight here."

"I didn't realize people got so dressed up to view archaic foreign films," he teased. She was about to tell him exactly where they had been when JJ and Reid walked in, Hotch on their heels.

"So what club did you drag Reid to?" JJ asked Prentiss as they waited for permission to board.

"Bossanova," she replied looking to make sure Morgan had heard her. "I was surprised. There were a lot of familiar faces there, for me and Reid."

They were given permission to board the plane but Morgan grabbed Prentiss by the elbow making them the last to board. "Was I one of those faces?"

"There was this one guy there that reminded me of you. He was hardcore making out with a cheap imitation of Spencer. But were _you_ one of those faces? What do you think?" Not actually caring for an answer she stormed onto the plane.

"One good thing about Seattle," Hotch commented as they were landing, "It's three hours behind so we can go catch a little sleep at the hotel before meeting with local PD."

Once they arrived at the hotel, they were met with the unfortunate news that they would be doubling up. Prentiss and JJ were obviously to share, Morgan and Reid, and Hotch and Rossi.

Reid reluctantly trudged into the room he was sharing with Morgan. The older agent was twitching nervously and the silence in the room was thick.

"So, uh," Morgan began, attempting to break the ice, "Prentiss said you guys saw me when you were at Bossanova earlier tonight."

"Yep," Reid replied, not looking at Morgan as he laid out clothes for the following day.

"So I'm sure you were a little surprised . . ."

"How long?" Reid whispered.

"Huh?"

"How long have you been dating guys?"

"Well I guess I'm bisexual so since like college I guess."

Reid nodded, trying to keep his voice from quivering when he asked, "and that guy we saw you with tonight?"

"Oh, uh, his name is Ryder. He's an architect. He's thirty."

"How long have you been seeing him?" The tears were freely falling down Reid's face.

"Uh, a couple weeks. This was our third date." Reid nodded. "Is this, is this a problem man?"

"You're an idiot," he quietly proclaimed.

"Excuse me?"

"Just . . . just tell me what's wrong with me? Why am I not good enough for you?"

"What are you talking about?"

"Well you've never made a move on me and you're going out with someone who kinda looks like me so I just want to know which of my character flaws is so repugnant to you that you don't want to be with me."

". . ."

"Is it that I'm drug addict? I don't think you'd hold that against me, seeing as I've been clean for six years, but hey, you never know. Is it my social awkwardness? I'm sorry, I can't change it; it's not surprising for someone of my intellect. Is that I talk too much? I know that I do but if you can tolerate being friends with me then I don't see why it should be a deal breaker. Unless that's it, and you really are just tolerating me. Just please Morgan . . . what's the matter with me?"

"Reid, man, I don't understand where this is coming from."

"Where this is coming from? Where this is coming from? I've been in love with you since the day I met you Morgan! I knew we would never be together but I actually took comfort in the fact that it was because you were heterosexual because then there wasn't a 'reason' per se. But knowing your bisexual . . . well now I feel like an idiot because I've been pining away for you for years only to find out it's not that you don't want me because you're heterosexual, it's simply that you don't want me! So all I want to know is why? Why don't you want me? Why am I not good enough?"

"Reid," Morgan said slowly, placing a hand gently on Reid's arm only to have him pull away, "Reid there's nothing wrong with you, I just don't think of you that way."

"I'm sure that's why you're going out with a Spencer look-a-like, because you can't think of me that way. If you're going to lie to me at least come up with a good lie."

". . ."

"You're an ass. I'm going to go sleep in the girls' room." Reid grabbed his room key, but Morgan slammed the door shut from behind him before he could escape.

"Is it really necessary to bring them into this?"

"They already know! Every agent in Quantico probably knows I'm in love with you! Except for you apparently! But everyone else knows, and everyone has always assumed I'm poor little Spencer, in love with my heterosexual best friend. And Emily was with me tonight at Bossanova, and if you don't think she's told JJ, well you're not only an ass, you're also an idiot!"

"You already said that."

Reid was not amused. "Can I please leave?" Morgan numbly stepped back allowing the sobbing genius to pass.

Now alone, Morgan threw himself down on his bed and allowed himself to cry, certain that he had just lost his best friend.

"What are you looking at?" JJ snapped.

"JJ . . ."

"No. I'm not speaking to you. You broke his heart. Shattered it actually. And what's wrong with him Morgan, hmm? He's your best friend. He's an attractive guy. So why Morgan? Why?"

JJ stormed out of the break room, slamming her office door once she was inside.

"Reid, where are you going?"

"To stay with the girls."

"Reid, it's been a month. Don't you think enough is enough?"

"Actually, I don't. Why do you care?"

"I . . . I don't want Hotch asking questions, and it's not fair to the girls."

"But it's not like you want me here."

". . ."

"That's what I thought." Reid grabbed his bag and left the room to stay with the girls, just as he had the past several cases.

"Emily, please."

"What do you want Morgan?"

"How do I . . . how do I fix it?"

She set her book down on the seat next to her and sighed. "I don't know that you can. He settled for being your best friend because he thought you were straight and he was gay and he couldn't do anything about it. But now he knows you're . . . bi, I guess . . . and all he can do is think about what his fatal flaw must be that you don't want him . . . and he has to wonder if there's something that horribly wrong with him, then is your friendship even real. I don't know how you fix that."

". . ."

"Morgan . . . Morgan, hey, are you crying?"

He swiped at his eyes and shook his head.

"Oh Morgan." She slid across to the other seat and held him while he silently cried, her heart breaking for them both.

"I love him Emily," he whispered, his head still buried against her chest.

"Then why . . ."

"He deserves better," he said sorrowfully, even softer than his last confession.

"Oh no, honey, no . . ."

"What the hell do you want?" Reid demanded.

"Pretty boy-"

"Do NOT call me that! You do NOT get to call me that!"

"I'm sorry! I'm sorry!" Morgan exclaimed before Reid slammed his front door in his face . . . again . . . "Please, I just, I just want to talk. I miss you, so much. It's been two months since you've talked to me outside of work and hell, you hardly talk to me at work. Please, I miss my best friend."

"Sorry, I'm not interested in being friends."

Morgan wedged his foot in Reid's front door. "Please."

"Leave. NOW." Morgan withdrew his foot and the door slammed shut. He heard the locks turn as his eyes began to well with tears.

Reid looked at his cell phone. He had six missed calls from Morgan in as many minutes. It had now been two months, 10 days, 22 hours, 11 minutes and 47 seconds since they last spoke outside of work. His phone was ringing again. Morgan. Sighing, he decided to answer.

"Dr. Spencer Reid."

"Re-Reid?" Morgan was sobbing uncontrollably.

"Morgan?" He replied as he jumped up from his couch, abandoning his book and searching for his shoes.

"I n-need you . . . puh-please Spencer."

"Are you at your house?"

"Yes."

"I'm on my way."

When Reid arrived at Morgan's house he used his key to let himself in. He called out, but there was no answer. Clooney barked from the landing between the first and second floor and then ran to the second floor, so Reid followed. Sure enough, Morgan was curled into the fetal position on his bed. The younger agent kicked off his shoes and climbed onto the bed, the older agent immediately clinging to him.

"Morgan, what happened?" he asked softly, rubbing one hand over his back, trying to comfort him.

"There was a sh-shooting a dr-drive-by at S-Sarah's school. Sh-She was hi-it."

"Is she . . ." Reid couldn't bring himself to ask the question.

"Sur-surgery."

Eventually Morgan's tears subsided to sniffles.

"Thank you for coming," he whispered.

"You're welcome," he replied softly with a sad smile.

"I mi-miss you," Morgan confessed, sounding as though he were on the verge of tears again.

Reid looked at the broken man that he still loved and sighed heavily. "I've missed you too."

"Why did you come?"

Another sigh. "Because I love you."

"I love you too."

"That's not how I meant it."

"How do you know how I meant it?"

"Morgan," Reid said in a warning tone.

"Reid . . . did it ever occur to you that I didn't think I was good enough for you?"

Reid looked down at him thoroughly confused. "No. Why on Earth would you ever think that?"

"Because you're special and amazing and beautiful. And me . . . I'm so . . . damaged. I have trust issues and commitment issues and all other kinds of issues and I'm not really relationship material. You deserve to have someone who treats you better than I ever could. And when all those issues rear their ugly heads, if we were together, it would break us up and then I wouldn't even have you as a friend, and you're my _best friend_. I _need you_ in my life; I can't lose you. It hurts to breathe when you aren't around. There isn't one thing I would change about you. You're perfect. It's _me_ that's not good enough for _you_. And I don't just love you, I am IN love with you . . . I have been for a long time."

Reid smiled down at him, gently stroking his cheek. "I'm in love with you . . . and in my mind, _you_ are perfect."

"Can we be done fighting . . . for the rest of our lives?"

"Yeah, that would be nice."

"Reid . . . can I start calling you 'pretty boy' again? Cuz I really do think that you're pretty."

Reid blushed. "Okay. I guess."

"There's something I want you to know."

"Okay . . ."

"I haven't been on a single date since that night at Bossanova; no men, no women, nobody." Reid grabbed Morgan's face and kissed him long and hard. "So do I live up to ten years of building expectation?"

"No. You exceeded it." They smiled at one another. "That was really cheesy, huh?"

"Yeah, but I liked it."

"Should we call your mom?"

"No . . . she said she'd call when she had news . . . I don't want to pester her . . . I'm sure she's stressed enough."

"Do you want to fly out there?"

"Maybe. Probably. I want to wait until I hear from my mom to decide. I definitely don't want to be in the air when she's trying to call me."

"What do you want to do then?"

"Um," Morgan looked down and felt heat rising to his cheeks, "this is kind of embarrassing, but will you just lay here with me and hold me?"

"What? Big, bad Derek Morgan is always the holder, not the holdee?"

"Well, yeah. The only other person who's ever held me is my mom and I think it's been like thirty years since that happened."

"It doesn't make you weak – or whatever it is that you're thinking – to want to be held."

"I know," he replied as they spooned, Reid's arm over Morgan's side, their fingers laced together. "But . . . it does make me more vulnerable . . . and the last time I was vulnerable, really, truly, intimately vulnerable . . ." The lithe form wrapped around him hugged him tighter and he was thankful that he didn't have to finish the thought for Reid to understand.

"Morning Aaron. Where are our boys this morning? Please tell me that they're in a big bed making up."

Hotch shook his head at Rossi. "Morgan had a family emergency and Reid went to Chicago with him."

Rossi raised one eyebrow.

Hotch sighed. "Morgan's sister Sarah was shot when there was a drive-by shooting at the school where she teaches. She's alive, but she's critical. Morgan's a mess . . . Reid made all the travel arrangements . . . well contacted Garcia to pull the strings to get them on the next flight . . . but still."

"It always takes a tragedy to bring people together. It's such a sad reality." Hotch nodded and the two men stood at the railing drinking their morning coffee in amicable silence.

After a week in Chicago, Morgan and Reid settled into their seats for the flight back to D.C.

"Thank you for coming with me Pretty Boy. It meant a lot to me." He laced his fingers through the other man's.

"You're welcome," replied Reid, blushing, embarrassed that Morgan was thanking him for such a small thing.

"And you inadvertently got the 'meet the parents' out of the way."

"Thank God you're mother likes me. I really don't know what I'd do if she didn't. You're way too much of a mama's boy to be with me if she was against it," he teased gently.

"Ain't nothin' wrong with that," he informed the other.

"With everything that was going on, I didn't get the chance to apologize before . . ."

"Apologize?"

"Yes. I'm sorry that I wouldn't give you the chance to explain. You're my best friend and I should have given you that much. It shouldn't have taken Sarah getting shot for me to give you that chance. I love you, and I'm so sorry."

"I'm sorry I never told you; for all the time that I wasted."

Reid brought the back of Morgan's hand to his mouth and kissed it. "Let's not dwell on what we could have done differently. We can't change it. Let's just move forward."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah . . . And I was thinking that a good place to start would be some make-up sex."

Morgan looked at the genius, eyes wide with surprise.

"What? It didn't seem appropriate while we were staying at your mother's house, in the room you grew up in, while your sister was in the hospital."

Morgan couldn't even blink. Reid poked him . . . and then poked him again . . . and again . . . the way Emily once had when she told him he was 'so life like.'

"Sorry," he finally said. "I just . . . I didn't expect you to be so . . . forward." Reid blushed profusely. "I . . . it's not a bad thing. I was just surprised." The genius averted his eyes, no longer comfortable with his own forwardness. "Hey," Morgan said quietly, looking around to make sure no one else was listening, "why should we wait until we get home?"

This time Reid's eyes grew wide, not with surprise, but with anticipation and excitement. He nodded his head enthusiastically and headed to the plane's bathroom, waiting for Morgan to join him so that _they_ could join the mile high club _together._


End file.
